So, what do you do when you have solutions and answers for others, and those same others don't want solutions and answers, and would prefer to play the victim or the martyr, and cloak those positions behind words of false pride like "privacy" and "dignity"? Essentially, those same people have overt, self-destructive control issues, and simply seek to micro-manage every aspect of their lives....and yours. That may be fine for them - but it should not be fine for you. With that said, grant them their false "privacy," and let them play out their dramas, and need to control every aspect of their lives as they see fit, even if it is to their detriment. But just also be sure to distance yourself from such situations, and simply do not fall prey to any false guilt they may lead you into - and do not allow any such dramas to be YOUR dramas, or to be detrimental to you or your life in any way, shape or form.